Assistants Anonymous: "On Making Enemies"

Assistants Anonymous: a new column for the thoughts you want to share but don't want to put your name on. Submit HERE.

By Anonymous Film/TV Studio Assistant

When I was in film school, everyone - professors, class speakers, classmates, people I met with for informationals - repeated the same mantra: “It’s important to make friends in film school. Look around. These are the people you’re going to be working with when you graduate.” When I graduated and got a job in the entertainment industry, everyone repeated a similar mantra: “It’s important to make friends as an assistant. Look around. These are the people you’re going to be working with when you’re an executive.” 

What people don’t tell you: As important as it is to make friends, it’s equally important to not make enemies. I graduated college 3 years ago and I’ve been working as an assistant at a studio since then. I still remember the classmates who made me do all the work in group projects, and even though I don’t immediately dismiss them (after all, who’s exactly the same as they were in college?), when their projects come across my desk and I have to decide “Do I want to work with this person?,” I flash back to the last time I worked with them. I remember the guy who was so competitive that he wouldn’t share his notes, but accepted notes from other people. I remember the girl who was so set on her own vision for our group project (a short film) that she wouldn’t let me or other group members contribute creatively. I remember the group that excluded the international student in our class because her English wasn’t perfect. All of those people are now working professionals in the entertainment industry who I sometimes cross paths with. If I’m choosing a collaborator on a project and there are two options - a qualified stranger who seems great vs. an equally qualified acquaintance who I’ve had a bad experience with, I’m probably going to go with the stranger. 

People are correct when they tell you “Look around. These are the people you’re going to be working with when you’re an executive.” But the takeaway “It’s important to make friends” is an oversimplification. The real lessons to be learned are: You need to be cognizant of how you behave and how you’re perceived. You should treat other people with kindness and respect. You should work hard and do your job well. Don’t gossip too much, get dragged into other peoples’ conflicts, or make waves.